Upcoming Releases, Rereleases. A substantial update.

Remember that Selftitled album I released at the end of 2024? It never got the attention or release I really wanted for it. I mean the physical edition just wasn't up to my own standards. Not only that, but the split I made with Blackhouse just didn't get as much time as it should have in terms of promotion or push that I really wanted to put behind it. It will soon! This is a fantastic record, a really solid listen and until I get my stuff back up for sale, you should buy yours from Blackhouse directly. Seriously, do it. I hope to collaborate with them again in the future and I feel like I derp'ed it pretty hard with this release. Blackhouse deserves better than to work with me. 

My view of 2025, though I made amazing strides in terms of moving forward with the project, especially in the first half of the year, is almost a sigh. 

The beginning was marked with the death of my niece. It messed me up more than I thought it would. Of course I still think about her all the time, and for me grief and death always hit me when there's something I want to ask somebody, or a joke I want to tell them and I realize that I just can't. I don't talk about grieving much even though death is a big part of the music I make. Music is the only way I'm comfortable or can express this sort of thing. 

That coupled with everything else - I really didn't have a lot of time last year to do a lot of what I wanted to do, and I don't know where that time went. Poor time management is the only thing I can attribute it to, and that's completely my fault, of course. Depression is stupid. 

Oddly enough, and I'm okay with talking about this openly, much to the chagrin of several people I know - the downward slide into weird time management issues started when I stopped taking a specific medication. I started taking it again, and now everything is coming together. Again, depression is stupid. Mental illness is stupid. I have to have a lot of empathy for those that are going through much worse than I am, because most certainly are, and I hate having to take this specific thing every day in order just to function. 

But anyway - with that out of the way - here's what's coming this year, this order:

Rereleases!!!! -----

Self-Titled Rerelease - 

LP/12" on Clear Lathe Cut. These are in hand now, I just have to make an insert and they'll be available. They look great and sound pretty great as well. I mean it, these are beautiful. Has a slightly different master of the album in mono. (Total of 50 of these.) 

CD - Finally on silver CD in an engraved jewel case with booklet. The re-release will include both the original stereo mix and the mono mix that was used for the LP. (300 of these.) 

Tape - Finally on tape, the original format I wanted to release but didn't get to. (100 of these. Original stereo mix.) 

Melancholia: Isolation in Four Movements

CD - Silver CD with an engraved jewel case and an insert/liner notes. Remastered. (200 of these.) 

Tape - It's a cassette of this album! (100 of these.)

Resurrection of Dry Bones

CD - Silver CD with engraved jewel case and an insert/liner notes. Nothing will change. (200 of these.)

Tape - Likewise, it's a cassette of this album. (100 of these.) 

New Releases!!!! -----

Church Sickness - It's coming out and it sounds good. I've started and restarted this so many times, it was supposed to be out in August of last year. I finally had to really place a strict amount of effort on this to really get it to where I want it. I'm still working on it, but it's the absolute best I can do. Like everything else I'm doing, it is the best I can do at any given time. Even if that's inconsistent...

The content is about church issues. It's about cults. It's about control. 

I am seeking label assistance with this release. If this doesn't happen, I will self release it, but I think this would benefit from wider promotion and distribution and I would like to work with a label for this. 

My Vision Of Hell - This album is about exactly what the title says. I haven't had many very detailed, specific visions, but the ones I've had have directly informed this project. This was the most vivid, terrifying thing I've ever experienced. I was definitely shown for a reason. This is extremely hard to work on and progress is slow. I think I will finish it this year, but time will tell. 

Fruits of the Spirit Selftitled Album - As I stated before, I'm only making one album for this project. All material I've created for it thus far hasn't been scrapped, but it will be released on a collection along with the Joy EP with new artwork. This will only be released on tape and LP. 

EP Collection - I've released a handful of EPs for R.I.O.S. and I'm compiling these into an album. I'm going to do my best to order it in a way that makes sense and actually sounds like an album, but it's really just a collection of these tracks. It will also have some other recordings on it that didn't make the cut. It's going to be interesting, but will likely only be released on CD. 

Fruits of the Spirit - Up Until Now Collection - Before I knew that using AI was extremely frowned upon within the Dungeon Synth/Comfy Synth/Dark Ambient scene, I used it to make the artwork for my Joy! EP and my singles for the project. If only I had known. This really crippled the way forward for this project in a way that I didn't understand until more recently. I really didn't like using AI for the artwork for any of my projects, but at the time, I was broke and I figured it was a necessity. Thanks to some guidance/help from some in the Dungeon Synth scene, I've had it explained gently (thank you for that) and received suggestions. I'm thankful that this scene is as supportive as it is. So, as a result, the Joy EP, along with all the tracks produced for the project prior to this year will be released on a CD & Tape collection. I like this material but I'm a better musician than I was and I have a better idea for where I want to take the project for the full length. This will be a nice start in comparison to the false starts I had before. Thanks for everyone's continued patience and gentle nudging regarding this project. 

Other Stuff!

I have a new secular side project that runs deep into Dungeon Synth territory. I might talk about it here a bit, I might not. Most everything I do now is touched in some way by my religious beliefs or just things I find interesting outside of that. This hasn't always been the case. 

T-Shirts

Stickers

Buttons

Patches

And they're going to look cool. I'm not using print on demand services, not that I find anything wrong with them, I just enjoy having more control over my own merchandising and the quality thereof, I can also afford to occasionally support other artists, musicians, and independent businesses and I vastly prefer to do so over other options. 

Thanks everybody. Things are looking up. 

Artists I Will Be Working With For All Projects

Moving forward for all major releases/projects I will be working with the following:

Ayyarametallogo for all logos/iconography.  - https://www.instagram.com/ayyara_metallogo/

Doomesia for all cover artwork/merch. - I will post a link when I find one that's available. 

I can not stress enough how satisfied and impressed I am with both of these artists, and any way that I can utilize their services and talents for my projects, I will be doing so. If you need work, I would absolutely drive you to pay attention to both artists. 

This is for all of my projects.

Rejoice In Our Suffering

Fruits Of The Spirit

Spectral Remnant.

Sometimes...

Sometimes your walk is easier than others. Sometimes it's easy and going very well, and sometimes it's hard and going very well. Other times, it's hard and it's not going very well. It's never easy and not going very well. 

Even at times when I did not consider myself a Christian, prayer was a constant thing. I'm glad that the Bible gives us very specific instructions on how to do so, because prayer can very easily become a routine thing when you do it so often. Simplicity can stay, but habitual repetition can strip away the sincerity or it can become ritualistic, repeated blathering with an expectation of action. This removal I feel drives a wedge, a distance that is much harder to take away than to put in place. 

I try very hard to keep in mind that I should not have expectations of how God will respond to my prayers. Sometimes, however, the perception of silence can feel like an absence. I'm sure I've said all of this before in one way or another. As darker supernatural forces try to work their ways to introduce doubt and frustration in our path... we can fall into contrived platitudes often used to describe this struggle. 

It can be so easy to become cynical, and I find myself wanting to emit an audible sigh when I hear something that has clearly been repeated a million times by people less clever than the original author. This sort of frustration comes across as being self-centered and condescending, I'm sure. It's also extremely hard to avoid. When I have been called on it, it's very hard to explain that I find the phrase, or the action performed of repetition, to be irritating and meaningless and not the person delivering the message. 

I had something leave me in a Pentecostal church that had been with me for a very long time, and it needed to go. I felt it come out of my face. It definitely did not want to leave. Now, I am still conscious of the space it occupied in the unutterable space of my mind and heart. It is most definitely filled with something different. Something that is very affectionate and consistent, but will deliver the worst kind of disappointment when I do the wrong thing, especially when it's habitual or I make a conscious decision to perform the action anyway. It's very different when I fight it as hard as I can and eventually give in. I quit smoking again, if you're curious...

Then I had a few visions. These were dismissed. Not by me, but I won't go into it, or I'll be overcome with a very specific type of rage that I fight to keep at bay. I am considerate, as much as I can be, of others experience with Christ and the supernatural side of our religion. I have no interest in dismissing someone's experience unless it's negative, or in no way is a force for positivity. If your vision from God, or what you feel is a communication from something supernatural, is anything but positive, a warning, or instructions that build toward the betterment of other Christians or the improvement of souls toward our savior in some way, there is no way it came from our Lord. 

The Bible also gives instructions on how to deal with these visions, and to figure out if something is from our Lord or the darker forces that exist within the spiritual realm. If you do not employ these to your advantage, you neglect them to your detriment. 

Please be safe. Keep praying. Be open minded, but don't be controlled by anything or anyone other than Jesus Christ. 

Backsliding.

How often do you really feel like a good Christian? 

I'm sure many punish themselves constantly for their past, remembering embarrassments and errors in judgment that follow them forever in one way or another. Every time it feels as if something has been dealt with, it comes back later to stare you in the face. No matter how well you're doing, or have been doing for months, it seems to hide behind a corner like an invisible bear trap to cut through a tendon in your ankle. 

Addictions, habits, annoyances. I suppose this is a normal part of any Christian's struggle as we move forward, attempting to lead a Christlike life. Sometimes I feel like an imposter. I'm not new in my spiritual journey, but I try to retain the state of mind someone new to it, otherwise I might assume I know much more than I actually do. I still fall into this on occasion. I also study and interpret things in a very different way compared to how I used to. 

The basic outline, the difference between right and wrong. The things I know I should be doing and the things I know I shouldn't. The laziness and procrastination, and my failure to be consistent in many areas that require improvement. I understand what needs to be done, and whether it's because of depression, which I really strive not to use as an excuse for everything, or fear, I find myself making the wrong decision much less now, but moving more toward a paralysis of decision. 

Sometimes when you pray the hardest it seems like you get the least amount of direction. This is something that, I believe, we do to ourselves. When we receive clear direction and instructions, or we become locked in to a path that we know is right with the Lord because of the many ways he speaks to us, things seem to move quickly. It's when something, who we all acknowledge is at work in our lives and who we consistently fight against, and who we are protected against, continually obfuscates the path by using our own worst personality traits against us that leading a Christian life is the most difficult. 

As we approach Christmas and the end of the year, thank you for listening, thank you for the support. 

For New Orders!!!

I ran out of shipping materials!

If you order in the next couple weeks, it might take me a few extra days to get your order out. It WILL get to you, I promise, but please bear with me while I resupply on nearly everything. 

I will do my best to get any orders made between now and the second week of December to you by Christmas.